United we sit; or thoughts on crappy satire

I saw the film In The Loop last night. It was touted as "by far the funniest big-screen satire in recent memory" by a reviewer at the New York Times. Being that I love satire I reasoned that I would love this movie (Now do you see how great minds work?) As I watched scene after bobbily filmed scene, I waited in vain for laughter to swell up inside me; my mouth gaped silently open, no laughter passed through its portal. The subject matter should have struck me as really funny. It tells of how insignificant politicians, their insignificant advisers and extremely significant communications directors might happen to stumble into international conflict. I guess it's insightful if one has a phobia of reading. I guess it might be funny if one has a phobia of reading. If In The Loop offers "by far the funniest big-screen satire" then perhaps film is incapable of depicting authentic satire. Then again there is always Spinal Tap.

A fat old philosopher used to say that you had to first realize that experiences of beauty derived from inside yourself, otherwise you'd be unable to appreciate what's beautiful outside yourself. He said we needed to carry beauty with us in this life, or we would be disappointed when we failed to experience beautiful things. Maybe something similar happened with me and that crappy movie last night. I had no humor in me so I failed to see it in the film. At one point one of the interchangeable "brilliant and ambitious" young policy advisers quips that another character's balls are so big they're like "the bottom two balls of a snowman." The other three people in the theater laughed at this but my brow remained furrowed, and I thought "that's as anatomically unsound a proposition as I care to imagine." While In The Loop will appeal to a sensibility which is already well aware that in politics as in everything else, people often blindly stumble into decisions which have far-reaching consequences, I would deny that the film captured the illusive tone of authentic satire. I'm willing to accept my wrongness on this issue though, really couldn't care either way.

The next great satirical film will have to be a documentary. I hope someone's taking the time to film all these so-called "Tea Party" gatherings, that would make for superb satire. You don't have to worry about writing or casting, just point your camera to the great swaths of enraged white folk who see in President Obama's government an evil plan to destroy their way of life. The evidence they have for this: A couple white guys on Fox News, and many more on talk radio, say so unrelentingly throughout the day. The reality of these gatherings springs as though from the mind of a Mikhail Bulgakov or Jaroslav Hasek or Joseph Heller or Rabelais; this is profound satire. Take for instance the image above which shows an old man perched atop his power chair, fist held moderately high in the air. But the farcical icing atop the idiotic cake? His reliable steed proudly displays a sign: "United We Stand." That's hilarious stuff. Most of the signs are equally ridiculous, appealing to the subtle analytical organs of the kidneys and spleen.

There was one bit of banter in last night's film which did cause me to smile. As various people race around chaotically putting together a meeting of the G8, a man says into the phone something like: "It doesn't matter that the invitation is late, the Canadians are just happy to be there. They're always surprised to be invited." As a Canadian, I know full well the great inconsequence of my country's place in the world. An election looms, and our apathy deepens. Do not watch this space for updates.